For women, meeting midlife means menopause. For men, there is the equivalent of a midlife crisis. So, what is a midlife crisis?

There are times when we naturally re-evaluate our lives. Hitting adulthood is usually the first. Being a child and having your parents watch over your shoulder is over. Another milestone occurs during the onset of middle age. For women, this can be variable, but is somewhere between 40 and 55, depending upon when other women in your family experienced menopause.

For men, this can begin around 40 or 50 and last almost as long. It is jokingly referred to as “man-opause,” but it is serious condition that has both men and women worried. Here are some ways to identify midlife crisis and get through it.

It is easy to lose your way, especially when what you thought was once true about yourself is in question. Let’s take a man who is an executive. All of the sudden he wakes up to realize that a younger hotshot is reaching for his job. In the mirror, his hair is turning gray, and he may look at himself and see a few extra pounds around the middle.

All of these things can give him the wrong impression of himself and lead to trouble. As the image in others’ eyes seems to have changed, a man begins to question himself.

What are the symptoms? Take a look at your man. He may be experiencing insomnia, fatigue, depression, foreboding, lack of concentration and focus at work, thoughts of dreams unfulfilled, his own mortality and those of shifting roles in society.

Many men have affairs during midlife crises. It may be like trying to recapture something that they think they have lost. And then there are the big toys like new cars and boats that can make them feel young again.

What can a man do? He must first recognize that this is what is going on. Next, he should discuss it with his partner and let her him through this time. Her love and reassurance of his importance to them can get his feet back on the right track. The grass is not always greener on the other side, and he doesn’t want to ruin his marriage, family or life trying to find that out.

Get help. He should talk to a family counselor or talk one-on-one. He should tell them of his concerns and ask for help with the feelings. Maybe he needs to rekindle his relationships and accept the new roles his life. They are different but that doesn’t mean they are inferior to who he was before.

Midlife crises don’t have to be his ruination. He should face it with support and love, and get through it with new knowledge of himself and not regrets.